© Copyright 8-15-2008 By Dana Shino, The Purple Phoenix, LLC www.thepurplephoenix.com Living the Conviction of Your Intuitive Truth Cynicism and disbelief are luxuries of three dimensionality we can ill afford much longer. The times of living within the structures of three dimensionality are over along with the cynicism and disbelief held so easily within these parameters. Although height, width and depth will continue to exist, their boundaries are and will be getting all blown to hell. So, cynicism and disbelief, some of the insulation that protects against fear, are short lived luxuries for those still insisting on the walls of their three dimensional worlds. No, its time for something else: living the conviction of your intuitive truth. I first heard this phrase last night as I fell asleep. It rung through my being: ‘living the conviction of your intuitive truth.’ I thought, wow, that sounds great. It feels noble. It feels like what I’ve been doing as much as possible for the past seven years and most definitely four years. But what does it mean? I don’t think I can really tell you straight up, but I can tell you two personal stories that will enlighten. These are very personal stories and I hesitate to share them. But I also believe we are headed into a time where our energies will be ever clearer to those around us and we will be walking story books for others to see. It’s only a matter of time. There will be fewer and fewer secrets and more and more truth (and my hope that it is encompassed with compassion and love). I choose to go first. Here’s the first story. It’s about money. And we all know its taboo to tell personal stories about our money. But I think its time to start. Here goes. Back in 2004 I left Joe who eventually became my ex-husband after a year long divorce. In the divorce settlement, I was granted a nice tidy sum of money, that if I so chose, would have bought me a decent home with a very small mortgage payment on it. I seriously considered doing the prudent, wise and traditional thing and purchasing that home, finding a new job and continuing to tow the line. But I knew that everything traditional I had tried up to that point in my life had been disasterous and unhappy for me. And Spirit said something to me about that time. They said, “Dana, it is your money, but it's more like Spirit money. And you can do what you choose to with it, however the home purchase might not be the best route.” I was not expecting this. They proceeded to show me this esoteric picture about using my money to fund my journey. (Which I have). Then they showed me a picture that just about the time my money was dwindling, our United States currency would no longer be valid and I wouldn’t need the money anyway. They showed me the purchase of a home was a moot point. I thought this was really irrational and illogical at the time, but I could feel deep down it was true. SO, I courageously chose to live my journey (instead of prudently living in a purchased home). For a long time I forgot what Spirit told me about the money and just lived on faith that my life would work out (and it has). I have a fully functional psychic business that is just on the cusp of full profitability (which I consider a magnificent feat in a two year period – talk about living the conviction of my intuitive truth!). I’m finally living in the country (a dream of mine) with a really good, wonderful, patient, unique and loving partner, Bob. But recently, I remembered this ‘reading’ my Spirit Guides gave me out on a remote gravel road, where I was taking a lonesome walk in the middle of the San Luis Valley trying to decide about my life. As I now look straight into the barrel of the beginning of Bridge Time, it has deeply occurred to me Spirit was/is right about the money. This is the year my money supposedly ‘runs out.’ (But we all know money doesn’t run out. It’s a representation of energy). As my money ‘runs out’ I seriously doubt we will be functioning on the basis of the United States dollar for much longer. In time there will be a new monetary system. After watching over the past year the housing and mortgage market mire in bad loans (and I don’t think we’re done yet), I see the ‘moot point’ Spirit was showing me about purchasing a home. These are not easy or comfortable truths to swallow. This is not necessarily an easy path to live one’s intuitive truth. However, I find as I more strongly choose to live the conviction of my intuitive truth, I am more in a position of taking care of myself, and the universe flows more easily to me and my Spirit Guides are more easily able to help and take care of me too -- than if I purely follow rational logic (cynicism and disbelief). I tell you this story and the following one to show you and help give you the courage to live your intuitive truth too. The times we will be walking in soon will require it of you. Here’s the second story. It’s about babies. We all love to hear about babies. Through the winter, Bob and I discussed and then chose to commit to move in with one another. This was no small thing considering he’d been single his whole life and it was a scary venture to move in with a crazy intuitive woman like me. For myself, the wounds of an emotionally toxic marriage are still fresh enough to cause me to want to run for my life away from any commitment. But Bob’s proven himself as a kind, compassionate, patient and humorous soul, enough to help balm my old wounds and help me see my way out of them. I think I just create so many interesting perspectives and stir up enough trouble he enjoys seeing the ‘what is going to happen next’ clause in our life together. In other words, he helps ground me and keep me on the Earth while I light a fire underneath his ass. Well, about 30 days prior to moving in together, I had a little visit from an entity. I was sitting at my breakfast table, minding my own business, eating my bowl of cereal. I felt something swoop into my left side and hover. It came in very solidly. So, I put down my spoon and ‘touched in’ to see what was up. The being asked to ‘come through me.’ I thought it meant come through me as in ‘channel.’ But that wasn’t it. So I opened again for the meaning. And there it was, the being was asking to ‘come through me’ as in come to Earth through me as a baby. My eyes filled with tears. I don’t openly talk about babies because its painful and one of the most difficult subjects for me. As I’ve neared the end of my 30’s, I’ve come to terms with the probability that I won’t have kids this lifetime. I’ve lived through being terrified of babies. Of finally gathering my courage and asking my then husband Joe to start a family and getting bluntly told no. Of weathering being in public places as a single woman surrounded by families and women with kids feeling so left out. Of being asked if I have kids and having to say no (and feeling like something was wrong with me). Of dutifully being reminded by an old friend from college that women approaching 40 are less fertile and I was running out of time (and this was when I was single). Of really, truly, asking from a soul place, ‘how in the hell do people have kids?’ Of feeling like having kids is so unnatural for me, yet simultaneously experiencing pangs of motherhood. It’s not been easy. Mostly, I’ve just blocked it and looked the other way because it didn’t feel like there was anything else I could do. So, to have a being show up while I was in the middle of eating my bowl of cereal and ask to come through me when I thought the motherhood ship had already sailed so overwhelmed me I didn’t know what to do. But I could feel myself at a cellular level say, ‘yes’ even when my rational self was saying, ‘no chance in hell this is going to happen.’ Somehow, I had tipped the potentials over the past two years. All that energy work I did to dump low resonance energies, to clear blocks, to release an entity hosting situation, to heal, to reclaim myself in this lifetime and past lifetimes (turned out my mother of this lifetime was also the person/soldier in a past lifetime who killed four or five of my children with a sword directly in my line of sight). (And I bet you thought my life as a professional psychic was easy because I ‘know’ things? Hah! What we ‘know’ also comes with the tag of ‘responsibility.’ Sometimes this lifestyle is like living on intuitive steroids.) So, there I was dripping tears into my bowl of cereal saying yes to the being, seriously doubtful myself, thinking I’m crazy this is even happening just a month before moving in with Bob. One week later, a psychic/healer at the Aztec Show confirmed spontaneously what I had experienced. I suspect this little one is coming irregardless of my rational doubts and Bob’s concerns – and just make way and room into our lives. We’ve already had several comical ‘accidents’ involving this ‘baby bean’ and as a result Bob said to me one morning, “Let me get this straight. You’re going to cry if you are pregnant and you’re going to cry if you’re not pregnant.” I said, “Yep, that’s pretty much it.” (God bless the men who live with us crazy women). And I tell all of you this because I believe deep down that I could have kept this a secret in fear, in case it didn’t or doesn’t happen. But damnit, I’ve come too far and we’ve all come too far to sequester ourselves within the doubts of our fears—disbeleif and cynicism. I tell this story on faith and conviction of living my intuitive truth that this is true and is manifesting. The thought of me being pregnant right into and/or during Bridge Time sobers me. It’s not something I would logically and rationally choose for myself. I know we’re in for a bumpy ride. Yet, I see and believe the children coming through are the anchors of light for the new time, the new energy. How could I say anything but ‘YES!’ and hold the door wide open?! THIS is what living the convictions of your intuitive truth are all about. Compelling Self Truth Telling Living the convictions of your intuitive truth are anchored in something else... compelling self truth telling. So many times I work with people in practice who innately want to hear the nice, easy, beautiful, confirming things. I know I do when people read for me or when Spirit is telling me information. But the long and the short of it is that staying in the safe, soft, secure intuitive zone is like swimming in circles in a river eddy. You just get dizzy and kiss a lot of water spiders near the river bank while turning in circles with the same stuff — until you get fed up with it enough to make a change. ...this is when and where you’re ready to tell yourself your own compelling truth. The first compelling truth I told myself occurred when I was a senior in college at Indiana University in early 1993. I’d completed all of my required coursework to graduate with a B.A. in Journalism and a minor in Environmental Studies except for the Micro-Economics course. The first semester I took it, I nearly failed out with a D. I was required to pass the course with a C average to graduate, which meant I was going to have to re-complete the course and pass with a B average in the second semester. I was sweating bullets because I did not want to have to explain to my parents I wouldn’t be graduating. This meant I had to start telling myself a new truth. Even though I’d nearly completed a college degree, somehow I arrived all the way through school feeling like an absolute DUMMY deep down—because I intrinsically felt I was different and learned differently from the other students. I didn’t fit. To pass Micro-Econ I had to tell myself a new truth: I am intelligent. I can do this. Even though I learn differently, it’s okay. So, then I pulled the stops out and passed Micro-Econ with a B+ and graduated on time. The second compelling truth I told myself was early 2000. I was $24,000 in college loan and credit card debt and my working life was going backwards. One day while visiting my beloved visit spot along the banks of the Poudre River, I told myself the real truth about my debt: my life probably wasn’t going to go anywhere till I paid it all off. From that point forward, every ounce of energy of my life I put into paying off the debt. It should have taken me much longer than it did. But by Spring of 2003 the debt was gone. Some months I didn’t have $5 to spare because I sent everything into paying the darn thing off. What I learned was that with that focus and commitment, the universe got behind me and I had ‘universal gift money’ show up from the oddest places. Big chunks too — like $3,000 here and $1500 there. After that, my third and probably the biggest compelling truth I’ve ever told myself was “Joe (my now ex-husband) doesn’t love me and would prefer to use me and my resources rather than help encourage my well being.” It was Summer 2004 when I ‘fessed up to this one (also on a river walk along the Poudre – I do love my rivers). It meant I had to start taking responsibility for taking care of myself, rather than wait for someone else to do it for me. That early evening, twilight, as I walked back to our tiny apartment that was our home, I walked through and under a grove of trees by the river. I prayed and asked, “Please God, please help give me the strength to do what I need to do.” I could feel the grove of trees embrace me with grace. One week later I left Joe and Spirit guided me through the long, grueling process of a year long divorce. These were big truths I told myself (and then acted upon) that dramatically shaped my life. There are also daily smaller truths I tell myself like ‘what food does my body tell me I need today?’ and ‘what color of clothing is resonating best with me today?’ and ‘even though I ‘should’ go to that event, something doesn’t feel right about it for me.’ The compelling truths we tell ourselves (and then act upon) shape our lives. When we are in tune with this and aligned to it, the intuitive side resonates, strengthens and sings. Frequently I have people say to me, “Dana, I just don’t experience my intuitive side as strongly and as clearly as you do.” I disagree with this. I believe we can all hear our intuitive side strongly, but listening requires that we might have to hear our own uncomfortable truths. This requires courage, strength, practice, patience and eventually shoving off the river bank eddy into the current and trusting. When we are willing to emotionally and psychologically take responsibility for ourselves, claim ourselves, honor ourselves and our truths, here is the fertile ground for embracing intuitive richness. Yes, I too love the comfortable, comfy intuitive sessions I have with my Spirit Guides. But the real action, growth and awakening occurs when I’m willing to open myself to the truth of the energy resonances I’m reading—whatever they are. Here, when I’m doing the more difficult work and walk, HERE is where I truly experience the depth and miracle of the love of God, my Spirit Guides, my Ascended Masters. Here is where I truly know and find that when I am in journey – choosing to act upon my compelling truths – choosing the live the convictions of my intuitive truth – here is where Spirit walks with me, helps support me, flows love and light and energy to me. |
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